It feels like so much has happened since last I blogged. We decided to tempt fate and get busy around the house renovating again.... painting, sanding, fixing and trying to make at least some of the outside decent. I say tempt fate as every single time in the past just over 10 years when we have made a huge effort to do some work on the house someone has died or we have become carers. This time was nothing different. Not that long ago we had my mother in law visiting, sitting in the chair outside talking about what we were doing, now we are about to become carers again. The project will be put on hold like all the others. This lovely women had a stroke a couple of weeks ago, mild in the scheme of things (she is still with us). Down her right side and when they say mild is it still amazing what functions cannot be preformed. Basic functions like feeding yourself, getting dressed and walking are all being relearnt. I am so pleased that I have some skills to help and I do massage on that side every time I visit. I just wish that it never happened.
Whilst this lovely lady is in hospital and rehab, I have been between moments trying to work on the projects. I have been sanding, bit by bit. I break the house up into sections otherwise sanding, undercoating, cleaning, fixing and painting the whole house is just too mammoth a job to even contemplate, even with lots of help from my other half.
So I have moved from the front bit all sanded, to the side underneath the kitchen window. I am about to get up the ladder and work on the higher bits, then mow. Today is very productive. My hurricane is busy watching "thunderbirds are go" his new favourite and his sister is at a movie with her best friend. She finally has found the most gorgeous little girl and they have clicked. Its very exciting watching this happen. They have their own language, the stand close as they can to each other, there goes all my space invader training she says smiling, they enjoy similar things and they are oblivious to the world when they are together. Her first play date today going off without is to GOLD CLASS to see Despicable Me and then lunch. She hardly slept last night she is so excited. My Petal is having a lovely time having a beautiful best friend. I must say I too am thrilled to bits.
Ok back to sanding! I will try not to leave it too long.
Friday, July 12, 2013
Monday, April 1, 2013
Family can you choose?
Not many people know this, I have a very large extended family. I have many aunts and some uncles with 3 or 4 generations over in England, I have cousins, second cousins and other extended family there, some in America, some in Canada and some in Australia including a half sister, nieces and their children. All blood family and too numerous to mention. To date none of them talk to me. I am alone.
I hear so many people say you cannot choose your family but it seems with mine it is very simple and a little cruel to say the least. You say nasty things behind their back, you believe the lies, you then wipe them. I sit and wonder what I did that was so very terrible that caused all this? I wonder if I will ever know?
I had no right of reply. No way to justify or rectify problems..... when I visited England I was horrified to see the grudge that was still held with my mum even though she had not visited them in over 35 years and was now dead. The hushed tones, don't tell her, the problems that were still there. One simple mistake even unknowingly and you are wiped. I saw over the years the coldness never thought for a minute that it would be turned on me simply because I was her daughter. I thought that my mother was difficult to live with, that maybe the things she said was just exaggerated but in fact they were a lot worse and much more petty.
I thought I was alright, I had one cousin in Australia that spoke to me however it would seem that has changed too. I have struggled with the lack of family and that connection. Some one to share the stories with when growing up and swapping memories. My children do not have that lovely connection either. It makes me sad.
I saw a family tree being done for my Other Halfs family and realised that this would be almost impossible for me as I don't even know my real family name. (thats another story). I would like to know so many things, I would like to ask questions and hear stories. I would like to share them with my children and partner. I would like to laugh about history and wonder about all these things. I have been excluded from this.
Family who needs them........
I hear so many people say you cannot choose your family but it seems with mine it is very simple and a little cruel to say the least. You say nasty things behind their back, you believe the lies, you then wipe them. I sit and wonder what I did that was so very terrible that caused all this? I wonder if I will ever know?
I had no right of reply. No way to justify or rectify problems..... when I visited England I was horrified to see the grudge that was still held with my mum even though she had not visited them in over 35 years and was now dead. The hushed tones, don't tell her, the problems that were still there. One simple mistake even unknowingly and you are wiped. I saw over the years the coldness never thought for a minute that it would be turned on me simply because I was her daughter. I thought that my mother was difficult to live with, that maybe the things she said was just exaggerated but in fact they were a lot worse and much more petty.
I thought I was alright, I had one cousin in Australia that spoke to me however it would seem that has changed too. I have struggled with the lack of family and that connection. Some one to share the stories with when growing up and swapping memories. My children do not have that lovely connection either. It makes me sad.
I saw a family tree being done for my Other Halfs family and realised that this would be almost impossible for me as I don't even know my real family name. (thats another story). I would like to know so many things, I would like to ask questions and hear stories. I would like to share them with my children and partner. I would like to laugh about history and wonder about all these things. I have been excluded from this.
Family who needs them........
Friday, March 8, 2013
Super?
What do you think of your Super. Do you have a few accounts and do you read the statements or not if they are lost and just let it go. I have been fairly careful up until recently with my Super.
I have a love hate relationship with it.
I decided that the account that I had which I had rolled all my super accounts and you can accumulate a few when you spend many years temping as I did that I liked on in particular and that was that. in they all went and when i had a lump sum to invest I popped that in too and grabbed the tax deduction. That was until the next statement and all the money that I had invested was gone. The market had done poorly and it was not there anymore. A bit of a nasty shock and this is where the hate part comes up it felt like someone had come along and just stolen the money with no recourse.
So I decided after another bit of temping that I would change my super into this new account as soon as I got a moment, it had to be better than the one i had right? I have the paperwork all piled up and the first statement of the account. Great, you say. Well you always should read the fine print and no you have to nominate NOT to have the insurance come out of your account. If you say nothing it's automatic and all the other things that they can pile on your little tiny super. My account in 2 months it went from just over $130 to $0.00 and closed. Done and dusted, so much for member protection and so much for the government looking after these small accounts. I rang and spoke to them, I asked about the deductions how could someone just steal from the account without my permission, we sent you a member pack! I asked how they could charge so many fees, they told me that they didn't even though the statement was being looked at which clearly stated, Account keeping fee, (charged on a weekly basis), Member protection fee, which I have no idea about and still wonder what they protected? So forth.... you get the picture.
I could write to them and they would evaluate if I could have MY money back. Amazing isn't it!
I think I have learnt a very valuable lesson, do not go with a new super account until you have all the facts, do not trust the super to just look after your money it will go and make sure that you read the details.
I have a love hate relationship with it.
I decided that the account that I had which I had rolled all my super accounts and you can accumulate a few when you spend many years temping as I did that I liked on in particular and that was that. in they all went and when i had a lump sum to invest I popped that in too and grabbed the tax deduction. That was until the next statement and all the money that I had invested was gone. The market had done poorly and it was not there anymore. A bit of a nasty shock and this is where the hate part comes up it felt like someone had come along and just stolen the money with no recourse.
So I decided after another bit of temping that I would change my super into this new account as soon as I got a moment, it had to be better than the one i had right? I have the paperwork all piled up and the first statement of the account. Great, you say. Well you always should read the fine print and no you have to nominate NOT to have the insurance come out of your account. If you say nothing it's automatic and all the other things that they can pile on your little tiny super. My account in 2 months it went from just over $130 to $0.00 and closed. Done and dusted, so much for member protection and so much for the government looking after these small accounts. I rang and spoke to them, I asked about the deductions how could someone just steal from the account without my permission, we sent you a member pack! I asked how they could charge so many fees, they told me that they didn't even though the statement was being looked at which clearly stated, Account keeping fee, (charged on a weekly basis), Member protection fee, which I have no idea about and still wonder what they protected? So forth.... you get the picture.
I could write to them and they would evaluate if I could have MY money back. Amazing isn't it!
I think I have learnt a very valuable lesson, do not go with a new super account until you have all the facts, do not trust the super to just look after your money it will go and make sure that you read the details.
Thursday, February 14, 2013
things that we do differently.
My other half has been retrenched twice now and although we have some time now between these retrenchments some things have changed permantly. We know that income can cease and savings disappear and life can become very tough. We also know how to do things differently now.....
Things that have changed......
We look for cheaper options and review our electricity and gas on a yearly basis. All insurances can be reviewed too!
We can get things at an Op shop or second hand place for a fraction of the price, sometimes still new with tags. Jeans especially are about $20 - $30 instead of $100 plus on sale. These jeans are labels and designer ones too. Recycling is good!
Making from scratch often tastes better and is much cheaper option not slower and painful as many people might think. We have eliminated a lot of take away simply because of taste not just cost.
Savings are VERY important and anything that can be contributed towards them should be. You never know when you will need these important little nest eggs.
We find out what we can claim on our health insurance. We didn't know that our children's swimming lessons are one thing that we can claim.... exciting to get a bit back .
Books have been an ongoing cost that was very expensive. We now below to libraries. We go to the libraries on holidays, we go to op shops for books and second hand shops. We also take back books to the second hand shops to get credits, when you have a child that chooses 10 books a time this all adds up very quickly and saves quite a bit. Recycling is good!
Research, we do more research to find out the cost of things and how much we should pay if we have to buy new. We question the quality and find out what we need to know.
Libraries are very important, lots of wonderful things go on there!
Making things is good fun and saves money. It might be clothes, food, craft or anything really.
Finding ways to generate other income is very important too.
Things that have changed......
We look for cheaper options and review our electricity and gas on a yearly basis. All insurances can be reviewed too!
We can get things at an Op shop or second hand place for a fraction of the price, sometimes still new with tags. Jeans especially are about $20 - $30 instead of $100 plus on sale. These jeans are labels and designer ones too. Recycling is good!
Making from scratch often tastes better and is much cheaper option not slower and painful as many people might think. We have eliminated a lot of take away simply because of taste not just cost.
Savings are VERY important and anything that can be contributed towards them should be. You never know when you will need these important little nest eggs.
We find out what we can claim on our health insurance. We didn't know that our children's swimming lessons are one thing that we can claim.... exciting to get a bit back .
Books have been an ongoing cost that was very expensive. We now below to libraries. We go to the libraries on holidays, we go to op shops for books and second hand shops. We also take back books to the second hand shops to get credits, when you have a child that chooses 10 books a time this all adds up very quickly and saves quite a bit. Recycling is good!
Research, we do more research to find out the cost of things and how much we should pay if we have to buy new. We question the quality and find out what we need to know.
Libraries are very important, lots of wonderful things go on there!
Making things is good fun and saves money. It might be clothes, food, craft or anything really.
Finding ways to generate other income is very important too.
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
I found Pink Pyrex.... wonder what is next?
On the weekend we went Op Shopping with the kiddies. It has become a tradition it would seem. They loved it and beg us to go not just once but lots. I had a whinging hurricane so we changed our mind on where to go and went somewhere new. Croydon, we haven't been there for a while and thought it would be good fun. There are a few op shops there and a reasonable size shopping centre as well. My other half used to work in that area so has a bit of knowledge of where to go.
The first place that we stopped at was quite good, we didn't realise they were closing and normally would have shut 1/2 an hour earlier lucky for us they were staying open a bit longer. My girl had great success at this place and I was pretty happy with my find.
The next place, was BIG, I thought a little over priced but upon further investigation they had amazing things and not too bad, (there has been lots of recent discussion amongst blogs about the prices of things in charity shops) . I had SUCESS here, butterfly plates perfect for the caravan, japanese retro tapas pots and my all time favourite thing PINK PYREX, I cannot tell you how long I have been looking for something pink and not found anything. I was following the advice of one great op shopping blog, "look up, look down...."
I was sitting down waiting for the children to finish, my back is hurting at the moment (a massage today will fix that). I was looking at this big place wishing that i could really have a good hunt however not happening. I looked under a shelf on the floor and there it was. I couldn't believe it, happiness thank you lovely op shopping fairy. (Made in Australia too)
This one was coming home with us.
One more op shop or maybe 2 as we were on a roll. My boy found his fishing lures that he desperately wanted and a lucky 8 ball. That was telling him to ramp up the pester power. I am sure they can smell weakness!
A pink princess plate for My Petal, we really need to donate the teddy plates that are far too young for them so I am gradually replacing them with more appropriate things. Not too matchy, matchy just what they like. My boy is requesting polka dots plates bright and colourful that we have seen in Coles, I am sure they will come on special soon enough.
Last place, Red Cross. I found a wonderful top, new shoes, my first ever pair of red shoes! A chunky bracelet, a silver scarf and I am done.
Croydon great for op shopping, great variety and prices have a look when you can.
The first place that we stopped at was quite good, we didn't realise they were closing and normally would have shut 1/2 an hour earlier lucky for us they were staying open a bit longer. My girl had great success at this place and I was pretty happy with my find.
The next place, was BIG, I thought a little over priced but upon further investigation they had amazing things and not too bad, (there has been lots of recent discussion amongst blogs about the prices of things in charity shops) . I had SUCESS here, butterfly plates perfect for the caravan, japanese retro tapas pots and my all time favourite thing PINK PYREX, I cannot tell you how long I have been looking for something pink and not found anything. I was following the advice of one great op shopping blog, "look up, look down...."
I was sitting down waiting for the children to finish, my back is hurting at the moment (a massage today will fix that). I was looking at this big place wishing that i could really have a good hunt however not happening. I looked under a shelf on the floor and there it was. I couldn't believe it, happiness thank you lovely op shopping fairy. (Made in Australia too)
This one was coming home with us.
One more op shop or maybe 2 as we were on a roll. My boy found his fishing lures that he desperately wanted and a lucky 8 ball. That was telling him to ramp up the pester power. I am sure they can smell weakness!
A pink princess plate for My Petal, we really need to donate the teddy plates that are far too young for them so I am gradually replacing them with more appropriate things. Not too matchy, matchy just what they like. My boy is requesting polka dots plates bright and colourful that we have seen in Coles, I am sure they will come on special soon enough.
Last place, Red Cross. I found a wonderful top, new shoes, my first ever pair of red shoes! A chunky bracelet, a silver scarf and I am done.
Croydon great for op shopping, great variety and prices have a look when you can.
Friday, February 8, 2013
First Week
It's the first week back to school for the children, the beginning of another year of learning and discovering and amazing journey. This week has been long and happy for them. I have been dreading Friday all week. I was thinking about it today and talking to my lovely friend in America (he's visiting there for a holiday, we all miss him dreadfully). I was worried about how exhausted they would be when we collected them and sure enough tears happened very quickly.
We have been so stressed and be bogged down in the mindset of yelling and being grumpy lately. It was such a hard year last year and letting go has been so very difficult. Anyhow today we resolved as best that we could that we would try REALLY hard not to yell. To be more positive, to be a lovely happy family again which has not been happening for a while. So we dashed around doing what we needed to and tried hard to enjoy the moments. First the library, a quick visit for the boy to play on the computer and have a chat with his friends and get his daddy to help with his favourite game.
Next stop, the swimming pool not to swim but change my Petals' class time so that she can start dance (finally). We saw on of the favourite teachers there all good.
Last time with 2 very tired and Hungry, Hungry, HUNGRY kiddies is going to be challenging. Lets hope that we only have one place that we need to visit to get everything. Fish and Chips for dinner. Luckily they have taste testing lady who takes a shine to my children and gives them extra tests. Disaster averted for a moment, now lets get the fish and dash. My Hurricane has other ideas and put in his urgent request for Prawns. We have to make, now let me correct this, he has to make prawn cocktails like Nanny. He needs, prawns, lettuce, little tiny tomatoes, sauce, avocado and pomegranate for dressing. Ok we are happy to go along with this.
So he has his plans and he is running with it, no stopping him. Full blast when we get home, he is so happy. He makes a beautiful cocktail and even has to have the table set properly, he chooses all the things including some new vintage placemats. It's gorgeous, we have to have candles, we have to have these plates. He chooses the bowls for the cocktail and the jugs for the mocktail and cocktails for us. He chooses the ingredients and is so busy. I think he has totally forgotten how tired his is. He is in control and having a ball. Photo's we need Photo's for Mummy's blog.
Everyone is given tasks. I am chopping spring onion, very very fine so it doesn't overpower things. I have to cut the avocado so that it looks pretty in the bowl. I am told that I have to make the sauce too. How do I? He gets the ingredients. He is smiling and happy no tears no tantrums just fun. My Petal is a different story however being taken along for the ride too.
Then all too soon it's READY. He is overjoyed when we score him 10 out of 10 for everything. It is a lovely little started and he is extremely proud of his achievement.
We have been so stressed and be bogged down in the mindset of yelling and being grumpy lately. It was such a hard year last year and letting go has been so very difficult. Anyhow today we resolved as best that we could that we would try REALLY hard not to yell. To be more positive, to be a lovely happy family again which has not been happening for a while. So we dashed around doing what we needed to and tried hard to enjoy the moments. First the library, a quick visit for the boy to play on the computer and have a chat with his friends and get his daddy to help with his favourite game.
Next stop, the swimming pool not to swim but change my Petals' class time so that she can start dance (finally). We saw on of the favourite teachers there all good.
Last time with 2 very tired and Hungry, Hungry, HUNGRY kiddies is going to be challenging. Lets hope that we only have one place that we need to visit to get everything. Fish and Chips for dinner. Luckily they have taste testing lady who takes a shine to my children and gives them extra tests. Disaster averted for a moment, now lets get the fish and dash. My Hurricane has other ideas and put in his urgent request for Prawns. We have to make, now let me correct this, he has to make prawn cocktails like Nanny. He needs, prawns, lettuce, little tiny tomatoes, sauce, avocado and pomegranate for dressing. Ok we are happy to go along with this.
So he has his plans and he is running with it, no stopping him. Full blast when we get home, he is so happy. He makes a beautiful cocktail and even has to have the table set properly, he chooses all the things including some new vintage placemats. It's gorgeous, we have to have candles, we have to have these plates. He chooses the bowls for the cocktail and the jugs for the mocktail and cocktails for us. He chooses the ingredients and is so busy. I think he has totally forgotten how tired his is. He is in control and having a ball. Photo's we need Photo's for Mummy's blog.
Everyone is given tasks. I am chopping spring onion, very very fine so it doesn't overpower things. I have to cut the avocado so that it looks pretty in the bowl. I am told that I have to make the sauce too. How do I? He gets the ingredients. He is smiling and happy no tears no tantrums just fun. My Petal is a different story however being taken along for the ride too.
Then all too soon it's READY. He is overjoyed when we score him 10 out of 10 for everything. It is a lovely little started and he is extremely proud of his achievement.
Thursday, February 7, 2013
JUDGEMENT!
I am finding that some days I don't want to talk to people. I get like this when I am sick of being judged or just over others judging people in front of me.
I like our life, it's not easy..... its an amazing journey. I find that sometimes I just say "NO" and rant and rave at the kiddies too much and then other times it's just peace. It's cuddles and tickles and baking and reading stories together and making things and fun. I love my friends, they are amazing people!
I see so much judgement.... I hear it too!
Do you work?
Did you breastfeed?
Natural birth?
Have you finished your assignment? I did mine in a week!
I don't think your daughter has special needs, she looks so normal!
You don't eat diary?
You don't go to McDonalds?
Do you buy things at an Op Shop?
The list goes on and on. How do they know when you are down to lay the boots in? I sometimes go to places and don't say a word..... imagine how lovely it would be if things that we said were positive. That people just helped friends.
Do you have days where you don't want to face the world!
------------
We have been working on the house. I have totally changed my mind about the colour, actually I have been brave enough to admit that I didn't want the lighter colour for the house, I do love it, I just have something different that I would like. I know others will say why? I know that many will not agree with my choice, however we are the ones living with it and I really like it. "Enigma" is the colour choice. A dark charcoal colour and lighter trims. We are keeping the green roof as it goes nicely with the charcoal. Planting a lot more green the same colour as the roof plants around the edging and trying to add more colour with purple doors perhaps an eggplant purple or something rich and lovely and then still working out more details. One area is nearly completed. I am so happy with the colour and my other half has decided that it's growing on him.... I think he was shocked with how dark I wanted the colour after he had lived with the other lighter colour for a while. I am not willing to do any photo's until it's finished I am taking progress photo's for us and will share when we are done or at least one area is done.
I like our life, it's not easy..... its an amazing journey. I find that sometimes I just say "NO" and rant and rave at the kiddies too much and then other times it's just peace. It's cuddles and tickles and baking and reading stories together and making things and fun. I love my friends, they are amazing people!
I see so much judgement.... I hear it too!
Do you work?
Did you breastfeed?
Natural birth?
Have you finished your assignment? I did mine in a week!
I don't think your daughter has special needs, she looks so normal!
You don't eat diary?
You don't go to McDonalds?
Do you buy things at an Op Shop?
The list goes on and on. How do they know when you are down to lay the boots in? I sometimes go to places and don't say a word..... imagine how lovely it would be if things that we said were positive. That people just helped friends.
Do you have days where you don't want to face the world!
------------
We have been working on the house. I have totally changed my mind about the colour, actually I have been brave enough to admit that I didn't want the lighter colour for the house, I do love it, I just have something different that I would like. I know others will say why? I know that many will not agree with my choice, however we are the ones living with it and I really like it. "Enigma" is the colour choice. A dark charcoal colour and lighter trims. We are keeping the green roof as it goes nicely with the charcoal. Planting a lot more green the same colour as the roof plants around the edging and trying to add more colour with purple doors perhaps an eggplant purple or something rich and lovely and then still working out more details. One area is nearly completed. I am so happy with the colour and my other half has decided that it's growing on him.... I think he was shocked with how dark I wanted the colour after he had lived with the other lighter colour for a while. I am not willing to do any photo's until it's finished I am taking progress photo's for us and will share when we are done or at least one area is done.
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